No, I don't want your help

I hate have begun to detest the phrase 'do you need help?'. I do not need HELP. Help implies that I'm still involved. I wish to ... occasionally... NOT be involved. If you are 'helping' me, I still have to plan, schedule and manage all of the details, but now I also have a staffing issue to deal with. I now have to think through what makes the most sense for ME to do and what makes sense for YOU to do. Then, when I tell you what to do, I'll have to justify my reasoning behind my chosen division of labor. So, to avoid an argument about who should do what, I've learned that I also have to take into consideration YOUR preferences around the whole thing.

I just want you to come in, take over, and let me leave.... just for a little while, of course, but sometimes I just need to walk the fuck away and not THINK about what needs to be taken care of. I need to let my mind rest a little. take a break. veg out. not be on call 24 damn hours a day. not look at my watch and rush to get home to assess the damage, pick up the toys, and clean up the kitchen and avoid the squirrelly look that says 'what took you so long'.

I'm a control freak. I like things my way. I realize that over the years, you've learned that there is a price to pay for not following my not-always-obvious way of doing things, so now... you ask a lot of questions. I've loosened up a little. Try me. Just make sure you do it right.

love ya to pieces, sweetie.... seriously.